For her future I can...

Today is Sunday. It's bad day for me to listen something from my girlfriend.

Because she wants to break up with me. She realized that I'm not good enough for her at all. Maybe she needs someone who can be with her anytime she wants,
Someone who can smile at her when she feels bad,
Someone who can say "It's ok." when she feels down,
Someone who can hold her hands when she needs to,
Someone who can say he loves her and he means it,
Someone who can die for her.
That's what she wants from that guy.

I felt like I can do it, but sometimes I can't. Maybe I can try. I don't know why I felt really dumb, but I don't want to lose her. I think I love her so much. She's everything that I want. I don't think I could find anyone who can be like her at all.

I'll try my best to change her mind even though it's going to be so hard for me.

Do you know what she said after she said that for 2 minutes??

"Just Kidding~ I'm still loving you even you're not going to love you at all."

What should I say with her? Gosh! I couldn't breathe really easy at the last 2 minutes when she said that thing. It made me feel so horrible. How could I stop loving her?? I told her million times that I love you, and I seriously mean it every single time.

Haa~But today wasn't that bad. I helped my sister reviewing for her Social test tomorrow. I'm hella good at that. I don't want to say it. She's bad at History, let me tell you. She hates it really bad. But when I started teaching her, she text someone on her cell phone. I really want to throw something to her or maybe smack her head really hard. What a crazy girl~

But it's getting better when she started writing short note. I wish I could write as typing as her. It's not like fast, but it's neat. Next time I would ask her to help me with English. Oh! I already asked her to read the new book that I just got, but she said "I'll do it later, OK?" Maybe I should pay her like 100 baht or take her out to lunch or dinner or something and ask her again for help. Ha-ha~

I'm getting so tired right now. I'm having my uncle over for dinner. He wants to meet my sister because she just got back from the US (it's like almost a month now) I don't know why my sister just helped the neighbor for English essay all the time. After she got done, she went outside. I followed her to my neighbor's house like 2 houses away from my house. They're having dinner. My neighbor made steam chicken. I came inside and had some. It's so good. Our dinner was great, too. Tons of food that my parents went to the market place and get lots of food. (Just for dinner??)

Well, I think I have to go now. I have to help my sister working on Social project. (I already told you that she's not good at that, right?) She's yelling at me now!! I have to go and help her unless she won't help me with new American Crime book at all.

Cheers,